Two Myths about Happiness at Work and How We Get it Wrong

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This month’s Culture Matters conversation was about the Myths of Happiness at Work. We talked about the Myths of Happiness including:

1) The pressure to be happy all the time. There is a myth that if you are not leaping for joy every minute at work, you have mental problems. Shouldn’t the expectation be adjusted? Do you even know anyone who is leaping for joy every minute of every work day? I don’t.

People who are happy all the time miss out on the exhilaration of triumph. They miss the opportunity to stretch and grow through adversity if they don’t have any or they deny it. In the midst of adversity, see the opportunity and don’t sell yourself short. Don’t miss the triumph because of the fear and discomfort.

2) The myth that happiness will come when something else happens. In the little book, Put Your Whole Self In: Life and Leadership the Hokey Pokey Way, I talk about 5 All-In strategies to high performance. One of the strategies is to Enjoy Now. It’s included because people often expect happiness to depend on others.

You might hear people say, “I’ll be happy when I get married.” Or, “I’ll be happy when we have kids.” Or, “I’ll be happy when the new boss arrives.” Or, “I’ll be happy when the team meets its numbers.”

What ends up happening? You get the thing and realize it is less satisfying than anticipated. The pressure of happiness practically ruins the accomplishment.

In the Culture Matters conversation, small groups talked about those two myths and more. What we realized is that happiness is an emotion. It fluctuates and depends on action. Joy can be a state, but happiness is an emotion.

Here are five actions that can lead to more happiness at work. These are within your own realm and not reliant upon others.

  1. Recognize how you are feeling throughout the day.

  2. Allow yourself to feel your emotions honestly. That does not mean you share every single one with others or that you enter interactions wearing your emotions on your sleeve all the time. After all, we do not always need support from others anyway.

  3. Focus on service to others to get out of your own head. Turn your attention and energy away from self and toward others when you cannot wrap your head around your situation.

  4. Be happy for others. Share their accomplishments and congratulate them wholeheartedly.
    See the link between your work and your vision for your future. If there’s not one, is a change needed?

  5. Look for ways to make a difference to others at work.

Remembers, it is not your boss’s job to make you happy. Smart companies and leaders create cultures that stimulate employees, encourage growth, and reward accomplishments. That’s all nice. However, do not allow those external elements to determine whether you are happy. You can control that within, and that is where the power of it grows.

Here’s a tool shared after the Culture Matters conversation. It is the Emo Meter you can use to assess yourself prior to meeting with others.

Here is an article from Inc. magazine about happiness at work—turns out, the research supports the points made here.

Set yourself up for success and happiness by being aware, making a difference, and sharing others’ happiness.